Daily writing prompt
What colleges have you attended?
Baggage. I had more baggage than I could handle at a young age. I truly loved learning from day 1 at school. Yet I never considered going to college because it was just financially impossible. Everyone has their own idea of what it means to be poor, so I feel that time is wasted on explaining the level of poverty I was at when there are always plenty of people who are far worse/far better yet still are “poor”. I worked very hard, straight from high school and earned a decent salary. Within the first 3 years, I had married, had a baby, bought a house, divorced and sold a house. I was the epitome of a woman with baggage.
Now at the ripe old age of 22 I headed to college on my employer’s dime, at night. No computers to do online classes, I had to physically be there, 3 nights a week, after work, and exhausted, run my household and get back to work the following morning. I lasted 18 months but managed to pick up some very useful lessons relative to my current position and made some great contacts. I chose to put “college” on hold. I had met my soon to be future husband at work and we began dating. He was very good at coaching me to improve myself and set goals and within the next three years, I continued to be promoted and we married. Before I was 30, I became an executive in the financial services firm I worked at since high school. We did not plan, but were happily surprised by the arrival of twins. With 4 children at home, (husband brought a child along from his first marriage) we both agreed life could be saner if I were to stay home. And it was, it really was.
After a one year adjustment on my part, I actually settled into a life of a stay at home parent: parent/ teacher associations, volunteering at school, chairing the newly named “publishing center” at school, librarian assistant. I embraced everything and it was all done on school time for the kids, and we’d all pile into the car and ride home to get ready for homework, dinner, bath time and bedtime. As I write it, it sounds rote, mundane, etc. It was anything but, it was a kaleidoscope of learning that was so intensely fun and interesting. And I would never have known anything of it had we not been surprised with twins. I dabbled in and out of classes over the years at our local community college, but came to realize I would not likely ever be the proud owner of a degree.
Yet I do not have regret and I think that is really important to note. I can and do see all the wonderful things earning a degree can offer. It also saves the sting of embarrassment (more so in my younger years) of explaining, no degree, but I “insert long explanation here and watch the subject’s eyes glaze over”. It may have made things a bit easier for me (especially when I finally returned to work) to have that degree on my resume.
I recall a friend of mine offered to read my resume when we had relocated and I began my search for employment. Her opinion was that without a degree I had very little chance of finding a good job. I disagreed and said that my previous job typically required a degree and yet I had been successful. Her reply was that at that time, I was younger, prettier and more slender (ouch!) so it would be different this time. Again, I had to rely on contacts and first impressions to get in, and then work really hard to prove myself once offered an opportunity. Not only did I get the job, but I eventually worked my way up to being a Regional Vice President of the entire state for our financial organization, sans an official degree. I managed many who had degrees, some with next level. Some impressive, some not so much.
While not usual, my performance offered me a route less followed. Could I have gone even higher with a degree? It’s quite possible. Would I have been smarter? I wouldn’t even know how to measure that, and I don’t feel that I need to – it was enough for me. “Enough” is one of my favorite words. Enough. It’s the sweet spot between what we truly need and what we want. When I land in this serenely serendipitous place, I like to try and not just recognize it, but embrace it. Not enough? That’s a “driver” – the indication that. you need to make more effort. More than enough? It is not just wasteful, it could possibly have negative effects – complacency for one. Trust me, you want just “enough”.
I think the key is this, if you sense that you want to go to college, then it is vitally important that you do so. Especially if you feel drawn to a specific field. Listening to that inner voice is everything in life. But if you are unsure, especially in today’s super expensive climate, then maybe think about working, or working and going to school part time. The working world is a college of sorts, and your fellow employees will be both college educated and self educated. Belly up to the table with a solid level of self worth, some idea of what interests you, and never, ever give in to being lazy – at least never at work.
I don’t think one ever stops learning. I have enjoyed learning from both degreed and non-degreed people, friends, employees, employers. I think the more important question is, how much attitude are you capable of bringing without a degree? Especially when you may be up against multiple degreed competition. If that degree helps you in the smallest way, then do it. On the other hand, obtaining a degree for the sake of checking off a block on your resume is, in my humble opinion, tantamount to the complacency I mentioned earlier. I back that up with the fact that at one point I managed about 120 managers, many degreed, some not.
Sometimes the lack of degree can drive a person to excel to prove their worth to themselves. Conversely, I saw some who felt they were owed something in return for having completed their degree. (These were quickly moved on.) I had enjoyed managing people of varying degrees of education, but noticed that the primary difference in all, was an attitude that screamed “I will find a way to do this” no matter the ask. In the last ten years of my employment, I decided to leave the public workplace and work for my husband’s company. While I enjoyed it, it is a lot more pressure to produce with your own money on the line. We retired “with enough” in 2009.
Now my life led me along the path I chose, but I do feel that had money, support been available, I would have loved an opportunity to study medicine. Most of its fields require a degree. I have a fascination with human anatomy, and always was able to watch those public broadcast documentaries and programs showing various surgeries, brain, cosmetic, etc. I never looked away. I have no aversion to blood, guts and gore. Whenever one of the kids would get injured (broken arm, gashes, etc.) I would feel a calm come over me, as if everything became two-dimensional and my brain would be swirling with, is this an ER visit or do I have this? At my age, I know this is a question I will never know the answer to, and yet even so, I feel as though I completed my work life as it should have been. It was enough.
Laboccadellaverita 